Last week I was donating blood at the American Red Cross. If you’ve ever given blood you know that you have to spend 10 or 15 minutes at a refreshment area. Boosting your blood sugar back up I guess. At any rate, I am used to giving blood at campus organized events. They’re usually teaming with student volunteers eagerly looking for something to do and someone to help. On the day I donated at the red cross building I noticed that most of the volunteers were elderly ladies. I gave a double red blood cell donation for the first time and I was very cold from the saline they send back through your veins. Looking forward to something toasty I dutifully went over to the refreshment area.
There was only one elderly lady there talking to some others who had also just given blood. I made a b-line straight for the hot chocolate machine. Just as my hand touched a cup the lady piped up with a “I’ll get that for you. You just have a seat”. Of course me being raised to respect my elders was instantly offended by the idea that she would serve me when obviously it should be the other way arround. So I opened my mouth to indicate that she shouldn’t worry and that I was ok to get it myself and nothing came out. For awhile now I have been keeping myself open to the energy of others and as I turned to her I felt her anxiousness. Now as I was laying on my bed being poked with a needle – and carefully not looking by the way - and hooked up to tubes, I was watching another elderly lady at the check-in area and thinking that she must feel good being out of the house and engaged in a useful and meaningful activity. I hope when I am her age that I am not sitting at home in front of the tv all but forgotten and alone. So why was I giving the refreshment lady grief?
I decided to sit down and shut up and be grateful. This was my gift to myself. My gift to her was listening not only to her words but to her non verbal message as well. This was important to her and I was dismissing that by not allowing her to take care of me. All of that passed between us in one moment of eye-contact but it was very clear.
You don’t just have five senses. There are many other non-physical senses that we take for granted. This was empathy. It’s a skill I have been trying to develop and control since I have it in spades. I urge you to hone those other senses. I honestly believe it will help you in building and maintaining relationships in addition to strengthening your awareness.)O(
